But CrowdStrike took down our Windows environment in seconds once we rebooted for patching.

we’ll take your whole network offline if that what it takes to protect you

“Ask us how we know.”

We will MAKE sure this schoolbus never gets in an accident and crashes and hurts kids because we are bus experts and realized the safest thing to do was remove the engine from the bus!

The name with that image made me think this was for a new gaming engine tech, for a second.

“Pioneer in adversary intelligence” is severely overstating them. The security snake-oil companies have been destroying their client’s computers since the 90s.