All genders can pee in the parking lot

I have a hard time imagining making an argument where alcohol and cigarettes are legal and weed is not. In terms of harm it does to people acutely and over time. I understand the position of “nothing like that should be legal” and “everything should be legal” even though I disagree. But I think if you choose one, weed might be the least problematic?

No, it’s not easy to test for driving. But alcohol is and TONS of drunk driving incidents happen still. I think that’s more a function of not having non-driving options to socialize over alcohol.

I’ve got the closest thing to a software engineering job I’ve ever had and it’s similarly miserable. I have a coworker who I really like and mostly the rest are like you describe.

I can’t wait to get out of this role and back to having a more normal job. Nowhere near you, but I’ve worked a bunch of places in the US and none have been like this

Bro I have my first “big company” job after working smaller places for over a decade. This feels so real. I’m dying.

I moved from the US to Europe and I keep joking that the largest QoL upgrade has been my unbelievably dumb microwave. It has a power knob, a timer knob that is spring wound, and when it hits 0 it physically hits a bell like an older toaster.

I fucking love it. It was like 20€

US ex pat (during Biden’s term) in the EU, also engineer

There’s lots of jobs in English in lots of countries. A larger company has a much better chance of bringing you over. I would try applying for stuff as you see fit and go in with an open mind. It’s been tough but very very rewarding for us so far.

FEIE is like $125k usd

Looks like light, small toolkit, stem height adjustment

Yeah, certainly depends exactly where you go. A capital city and a rural town will feel extremely different on English speaking (and cultural/political views at that).

I think it’s quite possible to do though. Happy to chat or answer any specific questions you have, especially if they’re Scandinavia based.

It’s a tough choice to do something like you’re talking about but extremely fulfilling. I wouldn’t trade the decision for the world at this point. I wish you the best of luck!

US ex pat here:

I think you will find more success in this if you find a place or two you want to live in and run TO something instead of AWAY from something. It’ll always be a bit of both, but this post reads more like (very understandably) “get me out of here” than “I want to be somewhere new”.

Being an ex pat has plenty of hard aspects of course. I think some of them are made quite a bit easier when you passionately dive into the culture and life in a new place. At least to me it would be impossible if my head was still in the US.

Of course you’re doing nothing wrong! Just some advice if it gets a bit more serious.

Like many in the thread: Canada, Australia/New Zealand, Scandinavia, Germany, UK (not that they’re doing fantastic right now), Netherlands would be my top choices with your criteria. Most large companies will be more likely to have English speaking as the working language and you’ll learn the local language (s) while living there. Best of luck!

How has it been to find friend circles and such with being ostracized by the church/your community?

Glad to hear you and your son are out

It’s also HEAVY, so something light sold by weight just needs a liiiiittle lead to be a lot cheaper to make

I live in Denmark. I’ve met a few people who don’t speak any English but they’re not Danish :D

Also it’s a fun language learning trope here that it’s hard to practice because people will just reply in English if your pronunciation isn’t good/it’s obvious you’re not Danish. It’s not ubiquitous but it definitely exists sometimes